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All the flowers of all the tomorrows are in the seeds of today

Choose carefully what you want to reap:
The fulfilment of your dreams and aspirations are dependent on what you are planting NOW and what has been planted in the past. Do you want to reap more trust? friends? A job? Good health? Greater self-esteem? Then you need to be active planting your seeds: making those investments in job applications, in courses, in exercise, in healthy eating and living. If you have children and you are constantly shouting and showing them your anger and frustration instead of your love, don’t be surprised when a few years down the line they turn out to be fearful, angry, or bitter individuals.

If you plant sparingly you will reap sparingly:
Not every seed you plant will produce fruit so don’t be stingy when you plant. By all means be focussed: if you want a job in sales then apply for sales jobs but don’t just fill in one application form. Don’t be deterred if your plans don’t succeed at first. ‘Perseverance’ – an old-fashioned and underused word is key to your success. It is the metal that undergirded the great inventors, scientists, entrepreneurs and trailblazers of the past and reaped benefits that we still enjoy today.

Cross contamination and weeds:
Don’t be deterred if your plans don’t turn out exactly how you imagined they would. We are not living in a perfect world so expect to encounter winds of adversity that blow weeds into your field. If it’s within your power to remove them then do so. Weeds may come in the form of bad relationships or dead-end scenarios. Weeds choke our dreams and desires and can easily prevent us from reaping a successful and fulfilling future. If it’s not within your power to keep these weeds out of your life then seek advice or help so that you can move on. Counselling services

Water what you plant
Are you hoping to get a job as a designer? Make new friends? Stop yourself from becoming fearful? or lose weight? Whatever you have planted and set into motion you must be willing to follow through. Don’t be contented because you have started the process – you need to finish it. So, how can you water what you’ve planted?

If it’s a job application: Before the interview go to the office to pick up an application form and make a point of being friendly and outgoing to the receptionist or staff that you meet.  After the interview write a thank you letter or email addressed to the interviewer.

If it’s an exercise plan to keep fit or lose weight: Remind yourself of the benefits of being able to have a healthy body. Get someone to sponsor you. Be accountable to someone other than yourself. Find an exercise partner.

If it’s a plan to find new friends: Join a meetup: www.meetup.com It’s like Facebook, but where people actually meet new friends by doing activities that they enjoy.

If it’s a determination to stop swearing: Put a ‘swear box’ in the house. Let everyone know that if you swear you have to put some money in the box. Money that’s collected in the box can be given to a local charity.

Time
Every seed needs time to grow, so plant your hopes and dreams now, and be patient but also remain  focussed. When it comes to planting seeds that invest in your future the right time and the right season is NOW. That’s the only time we really have. We could wait until tomorrow but for some that time never comes. So, don’t procrastinate.

Plant NOW, because failure to prepare is preparation for failure…

……………………………………………………………………………………………………

 

Nat Cato
Communications Team

Every Second Counts…

Please support us by making a text donation.

Your text donations are free! Your network provider won’t charge you for them.
100% of your donation will be used to keep our Family Support Services running.

Text:  Time01  £2 / £5 / £10 to 70070

to donate now!

 

For more information: www.befriendafamily.co.uk/every-second-counts/

Every Second Counts is a campaign run by Westminster Befriend a Family (WBAF) to raise funds to provide practical help and support to disadvantaged families in Westminster who are unable to cope with the debilitating problems they are going through.

 

You can’t change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying about the future

 

Worry is an unwelcomed visitor that if he outstays his welcome will end up stealing from you. A certain amount of worrying can be healthy, allowing us to give our best and not take any unnecessary chances. But excessive worry doesn’t bring with it any benefits. It just takes.

While we are worrying we are physically in the present but mentally in the past or the future. Worrying excessively actually robs us of:

  • Joy
  • Health
  • Sleep
  • Peace
  • Relationships
  • Our appetite
  • Good job performance
  • Time

In fact it robs us of life.

Fear alerts us to danger and can save our lives: ‘fight or flight’ – adrenaline is released and channelled to get us out of danger. Pain tells us that there is something wrong somewhere, either physically or mentally – something that needs our attention so that we can get it healed and get back to good health. But excessive worry paralyses us from taking any rational, meaningful, or productive action. When you worry your body releases adrenaline but if the adrenaline isn’t used to get us out of danger it goes to our digestive system where it causes feelings of ill-health, and can lead to debilitating illnesses.

Don’t entertain the thief

In the same way that we protect our houses from being broken into by thieves when we are part of a neighbourhood watch scheme, or by putting adequate locks and alarms around the house, we should also set up mental barriers and alarms for when the thief, Worry, wants to rob us.

Instead of letting worry have a party in the rooms of your mind at your expense, take positive determined action to do something that would get your mind engaged: showing him that the lights are on, someone IS at home, and he’s not welcome there.

Don’t focus on what you can’t control.

When you focus on what is out of your control, you are putting yourself in a lose- lose situation: you can’t do anything to help yourself, and you are getting depressed by thinking about it.  It’s just a downward spiral. The fuel for your worrying is your attention. The more attention you give to the negative thoughts the stronger they grow.

We are drawn to whatever we focus on.

When you are driving a car, before you turn left you think about it, you look left, and then follow the path that you have seen. It’s the same principle with the human mind. We act on what we see or create in our minds. If we create doubt or worry, that’s the path that we will go down, leading to a roundabout that we enter but never exit. We need to focus on a route that steers away from doubt and onto something that empowers or supports us. Focus on positive things that bring us joy.

Don’t be a victim. Be empowered!

In life good things happen to people as well as bad things. The sooner we come to terms with that, the sooner we can break out of the paralysis of worry.  Instead of worrying and being a victim, try to empower yourself by asking questions like:

  • What good can come out of this situation?
  • How is this the best thing that has happened to me?
  • What have I learned from this?

Thief repellent

  • Go to bed making positive affirmations about yourself.
  • Wake up making positive affirmations about yourself.
  • Make a list of things to be thankful about and speak them out. Do you have the ability to hear? Some people don’t. Do you have the ability to see? Some people can’t. Do you have friends? Imagine going through life without the ability to see and appreciate beautiful things.
  • Make a point of just thinking about positive things, and not talking negatively about anything. Try that for a whole week… one day at a time, and then extend it.
  • Exercise routinely. Exercise is a great release for adrenaline and time to focus on building yourself up physically.

Another way of getting your mind off of problems that you have no control over is by helping people with their problems. You can do this by helping a neighbour or volunteering at a local charity that helps the homeless, children suffering with cancer, or people in hospices.

This could help in many ways:

  • it helps the sufferer,
  • it helps you to make positive use of your time,
  • it gives you a feeling of achieving something good and worthwhile,
  • it can take your mind of what you have been worrying about, and
  • it can even allow you to put your worries into perspective (even though they may be perfectly valid).

Some people like to share problems by talking to someone that they trust. They say that a burden shared is a burden halved. Whilst it won’t resolve your issue it can help to give you some perspective, encouragement, and maybe even help. Counselling services are very good at getting people to talk through their problems and explore ways of coping or dealing with difficult situations.

So, mirror, signal, manoeuvre…

 

Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.

 

Useful websites:

http://www.mind.org.uk

 

Nat Cato
Communications Team

Every Second Counts…

Please support us by making a text donation.

Your text donations are free! Your network provider won’t charge you for them.
100% of your donation will be used to keep our Family Services running.

Text:  Time01  £2 / £5 / £10 to 70070

to donate now!

 

For more information: www.befriendafamily.co.uk/every-second-counts/

Every Second Counts is a campaign run by Westminster Befriend a Family (WBAF) to raise funds to provide practical help and support to disadvantaged families in Westminster who are unable to cope with the debilitating problems they are going through.


Time heals all wounds… or does it?

The tongue is the strongest muscle in the body for its size and the fastest healing organ. It’s ironic that the fastest healing organ causes the deepest wounds that take the longest time to heal. Whilst the human body can heal itself over time under the right circumstances, the human mind often needs some outside help.

The mind is an amazing thing. We all have an internal recording that we make and play back to ourselves. It’s an internal voice that gives us a commentary on what we’re doing and how we’ve performed. We react to our own internal criticism/commentary based on our personality type: pessimistic, optimistic or pragmatic.

The mechanism in our brains responsible for the way we take in or filter out information is called the Reticular Activating System. It allows us to focus our attention on a few things and filter out anything that we deem unimportant. Without it we would go mad. This is the same part of the brain where we make affirmations – either positive of negative. These affirmations act as a thermostat which is then set up for us to conform to the things that we have believed – whether true or imagined. The key thing is that those beliefs are formed through repetition, trauma, or intense emotions.

Self-fulfilling prophecies:
Someone that has been continually told that they are a failure is likely to act like one unless their personality is strong enough to counteract the lie.

It is common for someone that has been abused to make negative affirmations and unless helped is likely to fall into depression and other debilitating problems.

In the same way that a broken bone if not properly set can grow out of position causing future dysfunction or a contaminated wound can turn septic, the mind of someone that has been physically or emotionally abused can also be hindered from full recovery.

 

Time

I just need some time to heal my broken wounds.

Not minutes, hours, days….but months or even years

I need to feel cared for, to forget about the anguish and pain

 

Time,

The soft trickle of precious grains that ran away.

Does anyone care? Who knows I’m here?

 

Time passes

Hope springs like the fading bleak of winter

And possibilities are bright before me

 

I’m beginning to feel loved and cared for

Consistency and help as time passes.

 

I’m loved and cared for and listened to

And strength comes over me.

(Nii Swaniker) 

 

Websites that provide help and information:
http://www.womensaid.org.uk/
Women’s Aid is the key national charity working to end domestic violence against women and children

http://www.mankind.org.uk/
For male victims of domestic abuse

http://www.nspcc.org.uk/
Help for children that are being abused

http://www.childline.org.uk/
Help for children that are being bullied

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Depression/Pages/Treatment.aspx
Help treating Depression

 

 

Nat Cato
Communications Team

Every Second Counts…

Please support us by making a text donation.

Your text donations are free! Your network provider won’t charge you for them.
100% of your donation will be used to keep our Family Services running.

Text:  Time01  £2 / £5 / £10 to 70070

to donate now!

 

For more information: www.befriendafamily.co.uk/every-second-counts/

Every Second Counts is a campaign run by Westminster Befriend a Family (WBAF) to raise funds to provide practical help and support to disadvantaged families in Westminster who are unable to cope with the debilitating problems they are going through.

Time is money

“Time is Money!” is a phrase that was coined (excuse the pun) by Benjamin Franklin.

It means that time is valuable and if you are not using it efficiently you are losing money.

Value

Value is an interesting thing; market forces often determine how much something is worth. However, value can also be determined by the worth that an individual chooses to bestow.

There is a website called www.Peopleperhour.com that allows people to advertise their services and determine how much they want to charge. On it, you can find people from the same professions charging from as little as £8 an hour to £300 for the same service – with little discernable difference in what’s on offer.

In our society, it is so easy to treat people the same way that we treat things by placing a value on them according to their jobs or net worth. If the President of the United States had to have a life-saving blood transfusion and the only suitable donor happened to be a beggar, he would still have the transfusion. On any other day the president probably would not have given the beggar a second look. It is the same red blood that flows through our veins – princes and paupers alike, and sickness and problems have a way of resetting our value systems.

To some people that we work with “time” is not money – it is life. To them, every day, every hour, every minute and every second is not accounted for in terms of profit and loss but in terms of survival or loss. To them, time can mean the difference between having a home or being made homeless, having enough food or having to go without.

At Christmas, we had a party for the families that we work with. What made it very special was the various companies that chose to add value to it by allowing their employees to organise it, provide entertainment, and presents for the children.

The time that those employees sacrificed translated into special memories of warmth, fun, joy, happiness and presents for the children of vulnerable families in Westminster. And judging by the photos, those employees also had a good time.

You see, time does not have to be money – although, money certainly helps. However, it can also be your expertise, your advice, a sponsored event, or donated goods. Time has whatever value we chose to place on it.

A special thank you to Experian, British Land, Land Securities, John Lewis and the Volunteer Centre for showing that time can be more than money.

 

Nat Cato
Communications Team

 

Every Second Counts…

Please support us by making a text donation.

Your text donations are free! Your network provider won’t charge you for them.
100% of your donation will be used to keep our Family Services running.

Text:  Time01  £2 / £5 / £10 to 70070

to donate now!

 

 

For more information: www.befriendafamily.co.uk/every-second-counts/

Every Second Counts is a campaign run by Westminster Befriend a Family (WBAF) to raise funds to provide practical help and support to disadvantaged families in Westminster who are unable to cope with the debilitating problems they are going through.

 

 

Every Second Counts…

 

In 2001 I was admitted to hospital: a black man, turning white, throwing up in green, and later hallucinating in orange. 

Hitting the rewind button <<

Day 1
I had eaten a lukewarm beef pie the day before and was feeling a growing stomach discomfort.

Day 2
Amidst the stomach pain and perspiration, I was woken in the night by the most intense pain I had felt in my life.  I assumed the foetal position and suddenly felt a massive explosion in my stomach.  I cried out accordingly. *(*UIIIIIIIIIHAAArrrhhhhhhhhh…ow!

Day 3
In a typical bloke’ish way, I assessed the situation, put it down to a bad experience, and was ready to move on – no more beef pies for me then!

Day 4
I wasn’t in pain but was feeling weak, uncomfortable. At 9pm I started to throw up – in green.  I began to really panic. Unable to get through to my GP, I contacted NHS Direct who after hearing my symptoms told me to call an ambulance – IMMEDIATELY!

Five hours later, I was lying in a hospital corridor on a trolley waiting to be examined by a doctor – who had just put on ‘the old Marigold Gloves.’ It turned out that my appendix had burst and my woeful assessment of the symptoms could have led to my early demise. The toxins that were in my appendix had infected my abdomen: I had peritonitis (the cause of my colourful regurgitate) and could so easily have died.

Symptoms
Just like an inflamed appendix a lot of the problems that are responsible for breaking families up, lie beneath the surface and are only brought to light when they display symptoms. If they are wrongly diagnosed, ignored, or left to chance, the inflamed situation may explode leaving behind fatalities.

When bad things happen to us, if there is no one around to help us understand or help us through the situation we try to make sense of it ourselves. If we misread the situation or are preconditioned with an inaccurate assessment of our situation, or of ourselves, we can make wrong decisions that can have painful or life-changing circumstances.

At Westminster Befriend a Family we put on our ‘marigold gloves’ and attend to those who are shunted into one of life’s corridors. We help families that are going through stressful and often debilitating situations: homelessness, abuse, depression, and poverty.

For those who are in desperate need and unable to help themselves – Every Second Counts…

Please support us by making a text donation.

Your text donations are free! Your network provider won’t charge you for them.
100% of your donation will be used to keep our Family Services running.

Text:  Time01  £2 / £5 / £10 to 70070

to donate now!

 

Thank you

Nat Cato
Communications Team

 

For more information: www.befriendafamily.co.uk/every-second-counts/

Every Second Counts is a campaign run by Westminster Befriend a Family (WBAF) to raise funds to provide practical help and support to disadvantaged families in Westminster who are unable to cope with the debilitating problems they are going through.